Tonight we had fried chicken for dinner. We all piled into the car and ended up at Fred Meyer after wandering around First Friday Artwalk in Old Town. It was Family Movie Night. We always have fried chicken for family movie night. With my teen daughter reciting her monologue while the middle kiddo tells me about his future fantasy car and the youngest helps me wash the silverware, I sigh with contentment. Such a day it had been and finally I smiled.
Today was my Last last day of class. I have three finals next week and a graduation ceremony to attend and an internship this summer. Then hello, official grown up status. And that is what has been on my mind all day. This is it folks, in a few weeks it’s on me to find a job in this awesome profession and provide for these amazing little buggars. Today, the weight of that hit with a force that made it almost hard to breath. All sorts of stuff hit with a a force that made me an emotionally labile ninny today.
I woke in the wee hours to pee. I hate when it happens so close to the alarm going off. It ends any chance of further sleep. The older dog needed to go out. As soon as I had snuggled back into bed the young pup whined. Billie got to take care of that one. But soon enough, Lynda Carter came bounding back inside and leapt onto the bed and was wriggling all over me in no time. As soon as she was settled back into her crate and I was trying to sleep again, the tears began. I was immediately remembering when Bob used to bound into the bed with me after an early morning let out. Bob would sit and silently stare down at me until I patted him and got him to curl next to me. The tears squeezed their way out and I gave up any hope of going back to sleep.
I heaved myself from the warm bed and pulled on sneakers for a walk/run (school has really affected my fitness level and I’ve let the early sunlight pull me out) and I took Lynda Carter with me. Once I was back home I was showering and that is when my brain took off with all that is before me. My Last last day of class. And I was having a monumentally bad hair day. Something about a girl having a bad hair day and the tears just came. And the panic. I had a to-do list. Hair was not on it.
I sat in my last class listening to my teacher, I adore her. She makes me want to know more and know it all right now! But I still have to make time to sit and watch Tarzan with almost 7 year olds and teenagers and almost 10 year olds. Families are growing. Changes are coming. Keeping in mind the beautiful moments when we are still and together is why I set out on this completely different and blazing adventure in the first place.